Today I finally had time to wash some windows. A few days back the morning sun shown through the living room windows and revealed that they had been sorely neglected. My mom taught me a great way to wash windows that produce minimal streaks. You first wash the window with a dish soap and water mixture (no measuring, just a bowl of warm water with enough dish soap to make it soapy). After that, you rinse the window with a mixture of vinegar and water (again, not measuring, just about 1/3 vinegar to 2/3 water mixed in a bowl). You rinse the window by emerging a wash rag into the vinegar/water mixture, lightly squeeze out some water, but leave the rag very wet and wipe down the window, soaking up the soap. Then use a squeegee and wipe down the window, finishing off by wiping down the window with newspaper if you have leftovers or use paper towels.
One of the windows outside our house was about one foot too tall for me to reach. I couldn't find the step ladder and didn't want to drag out a kitchen chair. My husband just got home and I asked him if he could give me a few minutes of help. I needed to give him the instructions of how to rinse as he didn't quite get all the suds-soaked up. Now I squeegee from left to right, but because in any and all endeavors we do the opposite of one another he went naturally from the top to the bottom. When he used the paper towel to wipe up the remaining moisture after using the squeegee he did short little motions and when in tiny circles. My way (always better than his, haha) would have been to make broad back and forth strokes. And this is how it goes with us whenever we do a task. Same task but always opposite in technique and style.
Later in the day, I needed his advise on how to handle a financial issue. I don't want to share too much because finances are personal, but I can say that I was most concerned about a personal aspect of the issue and he was most concerned about the dollars and sense of the issue. I need to talk things out to make sure that I'm handling things in the best way I know how, and this sometimes, no most of the times, frustrates him because he thinks I'm not seeing it his way. He comes at decisions with logic and practicality, and I come at things with saying all options and careful to protect feelings and relationships. Maybe that is a normal husband/wife kind of thing. It used to make me crazy because I thought he didn't care about other people, but now I see it that he cares most about us, his family and protects our best interest first. It has taken me a very long time to see this.
The hubs came into our bathroom as I was doing my hair. I showed late due to getting up late and then not showering until after cleaning windows. The fan in the little toilet/shower room had stopped working weeks before but in the last few days started humming along again. He stood under the fan and asked me, "Is the fan working?" I really wish that I was nicer and not such a smart ass kind of gal but that isn't the case and my reply was, "Can you hear it going?" He was miffed at this reply and used the room and then left. I felt bad because I thought it wasn't right of me to be that way toward him (although he knows how I am). I went to the part of the house he was in and apologized for what I said. He said that he was just asking me how the fan started working, but I heard a state-the-obvious kind of question, which drives me batty! This isn't the first time this has happened, we just communicate so differently. He will beat around the bush more and I am so direct it can pierce. It can make for misunderstandings and it takes a lot of working out. We just come at everything so differently.
As I am writing this, hours has now past since he went off to bed. He is an early to bed, early to rise kind of guy, on the other hand, I am a let's stay up until I can hardly keep awake kind of gal and I love to catch up on my z's in the morning. I need him. I need him to be that other part that I am missing. I need him to speak logic into my emotion. I need him to be stable when I want to be flighty. I need him to be at home when I'm done going out being social. It isn't easy on me that we are so different. What is easy is that we are also very much the same. We strongly believe in many of the same things. I have a comrade. He is the Ying to my Yang and we oddly fit together.
** I told him when I married him there would never be a dull moment. I have kept my word. I don't know how he puts up with me. He is my grounding wire.
Lesson (to myself): Give people room to be different than you. Everyone is wired differently and has their own unique life experiences. We are all the same in many things but we are all so very different at the same time.